{"id":221682,"date":"2025-04-16T10:01:17","date_gmt":"2025-04-16T06:01:17","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"-0001-11-30T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"-0001-11-29T20:00:00","slug":"","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/?p=221682","title":{"rendered":"Sevgini m\u0259hv ed\u0259c\u0259k duy\u011fular"},"content":{"rendered":"

Münasib\u0259tl\u0259r böyük ilham, d\u0259st\u0259k v\u0259 t\u0259hlük\u0259sizlik m\u0259nb\u0259yi ola bil\u0259r. Amma eyni zamanda d\u0259rin a\u011fr\u0131 m\u0259nb\u0259yidir.
\nSabitlik v\u0259 sevgi s\u0259thinin arxas\u0131nda kölg\u0259l\u0259r ola bil\u0259r: qar\u015f\u0131lanmam\u0131\u015f ehtiyaclar, pozulmu\u015f s\u0259rh\u0259dl\u0259r, yava\u015f-yava\u015f daxili q\u0259z\u0259b\u0259 çevril\u0259n sakit t\u0259hqir. 
\nBu duy\u011fulara m\u0259h\u0259l qoyulmasa, \u0259n güclü hissl\u0259ri bel\u0259 m\u0259hv ed\u0259 bil\u0259r.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ucnoqta.az x\u0259b\u0259r verir ki, bu bar\u0259d\u0259 “Psychology Today” m\u0259lumat yay\u0131b.<\/p>\n

Q\u0259z\u0259b emosiyadan daha çox \u015feydir
\nQ\u0259z\u0259b t\u0259kc\u0259 emosiyalar\u0131n par\u0131lt\u0131s\u0131 deyil. Bu, bir \u015feyin s\u0259hv getdiyini göst\u0259r\u0259n bir siqnald\u0131r. Ehtiyaclar\u0131m\u0131z cavabs\u0131z qalanda, bizi görm\u0259m\u0259zlikd\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259, aldad\u0131landa v\u0259 ya d\u0259y\u0259rsizl\u0259\u015fdiril\u0259nd\u0259 q\u0259z\u0259bl\u0259nirik. Çox vaxt biz t\u0259kc\u0259 mövcud v\u0259ziyy\u0259t\u0259 deyil, h\u0259m d\u0259 keçmi\u015fin sa\u011falmam\u0131\u015f yaralar\u0131na – u\u015faql\u0131q \u015f\u0259kill\u0259rin\u0259, x\u0259yan\u0259t v\u0259 ya t\u0259rk edilm\u0259 t\u0259crüb\u0259l\u0259rin\u0259 reaksiya verdiyimizi d\u0259rk etmirik.<\/p>\n

Q\u0259z\u0259bin özü pis deyil. Problem onu nec\u0259 ifad\u0259 etdiyimiz\u0259 çevrilir – v\u0259 ya \u0259ksin\u0259, ifad\u0259 etmirik.<\/p>\n

Niy\u0259 q\u0259z\u0259b yaran\u0131r
\nQ\u0259z\u0259b tez-tez bir insan\u0131n qar\u015f\u0131l\u0131ql\u0131 \u0259laq\u0259sinin n\u0259tic\u0259sidir:
\nt\u0259r\u0259fda\u015f\u0131n\u0131n onu xo\u015fb\u0259xt etm\u0259sini gözl\u0259yir;
\nona yara\u015fmayan \u015feyl\u0259rl\u0259 raz\u0131la\u015f\u0131r;
\nmünaqi\u015f\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n qorxur v\u0259 ehtiyaclar\u0131n\u0131 nec\u0259 müdafi\u0259 ed\u0259c\u0259yini bilmir;
\nöz üz\u0259rind\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259m\u0259k \u0259v\u0259zin\u0259 ba\u015fqalar\u0131n\u0131 idar\u0259 etm\u0259y\u0259 çal\u0131\u015f\u0131r;
\nd\u0259yi\u015fikliy\u0259 ümid edir v\u0259 t\u0259krarlanan m\u0259yusluqlara \u0259h\u0259miyy\u0259t vermir.<\/p>\n

Bu cür münasib\u0259tl\u0259r t\u0259l\u0259dir. Bir t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259n – sevgi v\u0259 ya günahkarl\u0131q, dig\u0259r t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259n – özün\u0259 hörm\u0259tsizlik. N\u0259tic\u0259d\u0259 y\u0131\u011f\u0131lm\u0131\u015f q\u0259z\u0259b nifr\u0259t\u0259, inciklik is\u0259 münasib\u0259t üçün z\u0259h\u0259r\u0259 çevrilir.
\nQ\u0259z\u0259b s\u0259ssiz bir m\u0259hvedicidir
\nTez-tez parlaq, ani ifad\u0259y\u0259 malik olan q\u0259z\u0259bd\u0259n f\u0259rqli olaraq, t\u0259hqir yava\u015f, s\u0259ssiz v\u0259 ç\u0259kilir. Bu, ç\u0131x\u0131\u015f yolu olmayan q\u0259z\u0259bdir. \u018fs\u0259bilik, passiv aqressiya v\u0259 uzaqla\u015fma il\u0259 özünü göst\u0259r\u0259r\u0259k ill\u0259rl\u0259 iç\u0259rid\u0259 ya\u015faya bil\u0259r.
\nBu cür duy\u011fular t\u0259kc\u0259 psixi v\u0259ziyy\u0259tiniz\u0259 z\u0259r\u0259r vermir, h\u0259m d\u0259 fiziki sa\u011flaml\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131za t\u0259sir göst\u0259rir. Xroniki q\u0259z\u0259b v\u0259 emosiyalar\u0131n yat\u0131r\u0131lmas\u0131 ür\u0259k, qan t\u0259zyiqi, m\u0259d\u0259-ba\u011f\u0131rsaq trakt\u0131nda, yuxuda v\u0259 h\u0259tta toxunulmazl\u0131qda probleml\u0259r yarada bil\u0259r.<\/p>\n

Q\u0259z\u0259b haqq\u0131nda dan\u0131\u015fa bilm\u0259m\u0259k ail\u0259 miras\u0131d\u0131r<\/strong>
\nÇoxumuza q\u0259z\u0259bi effektiv \u015f\u0259kild\u0259 ifad\u0259 etm\u0259yi öyr\u0259tm\u0259dil\u0259r. U\u015faql\u0131qda valideynl\u0259rd\u0259n biri aqressiv, dig\u0259ri is\u0259 passiv idis\u0259, modell\u0259rd\u0259n birini kopyalay\u0131r\u0131q. \u018fg\u0259r biz\u0259 hirsl\u0259nm\u0259yin “pis” v\u0259 ya “günah” oldu\u011funu söyl\u0259s\u0259l\u0259r, biz emosiyalar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 etiraf etm\u0259k v\u0259 ya\u015famaq \u0259v\u0259zin\u0259 gizl\u0259tm\u0259yi öyr\u0259nmi\u015fik. B\u0259z\u0259n aqressiv ata kimi olmaq qorxusu insan\u0131n h\u0259tta z\u0259r\u0259rli olsa bel\u0259, qar\u015f\u0131durmadan tamamil\u0259 qaçmas\u0131na s\u0259b\u0259b olur.
\nBununla bel\u0259, yadda saxlamaq laz\u0131md\u0131r: q\u0259z\u0259b dü\u015fm\u0259n deyil, s\u0259rh\u0259dl\u0259ri keçm\u0259yin göst\u0259ricisidir.
\nQ\u0259z\u0259bi idar\u0259 etm\u0259yi nec\u0259 öyr\u0259nm\u0259k olar<\/strong>
\nEmosiyadan x\u0259b\u0259rdar olun. Dayan\u0131n v\u0259 özünüzd\u0259n soru\u015fun: "Haz\u0131rda m\u0259n n\u0259 hiss edir\u0259m?" Q\u0259z\u0259bin h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 bir m\u0259nb\u0259yi var.
\nB\u0259d\u0259n siqnallar\u0131na diqq\u0259t yetirin. Boyunda g\u0259rginlik, s\u0131x\u0131lm\u0131\u015f yumruqlar, b\u0259d\u0259nd\u0259 istilik – q\u0259z\u0259b yax\u0131nd\u0131r.
\nN\u0259f\u0259s al. D\u0259rin, yava\u015f n\u0259f\u0259s emosional fonu sabitl\u0259\u015fdirm\u0259y\u0259 köm\u0259k edir.
\nReaksiyan\u0131 gecikdirin. Emosiyalar çox güclüdürs\u0259, fasil\u0259 verin. Yaln\u0131z tonunuzu v\u0259 sözl\u0259rinizi idar\u0259 ed\u0259 bildiyiniz zaman dan\u0131\u015fmal\u0131s\u0131n\u0131z.
\nBirba\u015fa dan\u0131\u015f\u0131n, amma sakitc\u0259. \u0130ttihamlar\u0131 “n\u0259 zaman incidir\u0259m…”, “özümü d\u0259y\u0259rsizl\u0259\u015f\u0259nd\u0259 hiss edir\u0259m…” kimi ifad\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 \u0259v\u0259z edin.
\nT\u0259hlil edin. Reaksiyan\u0131z\u0131n keçmi\u015f t\u0259crüb\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 \u0259laq\u0259li olub olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 dü\u015fünün. B\u0259z\u0259n yan\u0131m\u0131zda olan adama gör\u0259 yox, ist\u0259m\u0259d\u0259n köhn\u0259 yaraya toxundu\u011fu üçün “partlay\u0131r\u0131q”.
\nBa\u011f\u0131\u015flamaq özünüz üçündür. Ba\u011f\u0131\u015flamaq ba\u015fqas\u0131n\u0131n davran\u0131\u015f\u0131na haqq qazand\u0131rmaq deyil, q\u0259z\u0259b yükünd\u0259n özünüzü azad etm\u0259kdir. H\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 d\u0259rhal g\u0259lmir, amma bunun üçün s\u0259y göst\u0259rm\u0259lisiniz.<\/p>\n

Paradoksal olaraq, düzgün ifad\u0259 edil\u0259n q\u0259z\u0259b münasib\u0259tl\u0259ri yax\u015f\u0131la\u015fd\u0131ra bil\u0259r. Bu, böyüm\u0259 nöqt\u0259sin\u0259, s\u0259mimiyy\u0259t v\u0259 aç\u0131ql\u0131\u011f\u0131n yeni m\u0259rh\u0259l\u0259sin\u0259 çevril\u0259 bil\u0259r. \u018fg\u0259r h\u0259r iki t\u0259r\u0259fda\u015f öz üz\u0259rind\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 haz\u0131rd\u0131rsa, ç\u0259tin emosiyalar haqq\u0131nda dan\u0131\u015fmaq insanlar\u0131 bir-birind\u0259n ay\u0131rmaqdansa, daha da yax\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131ra bil\u0259r.
\nSa\u011flam bir münasib\u0259td\u0259 h\u0259r bir duy\u011fu üçün yer var: sevinc, göz ya\u015flar\u0131 v\u0259 h\u0259tta q\u0259z\u0259b. \u018fsas odur ki, özünüzü e\u015fitm\u0259yi v\u0259 hissl\u0259riniz haqq\u0131nda dan\u0131\u015fma\u011f\u0131 öyr\u0259nin.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Münasib\u0259tl\u0259r böyük ilham, d\u0259st\u0259k v\u0259 t\u0259hlük\u0259sizlik m\u0259nb\u0259yi ola bil\u0259r. Amma eyni zamanda d\u0259rin a\u011fr\u0131 m\u0259nb\u0259yidir. Sabitlik v\u0259 sevgi s\u0259thinin arxas\u0131nda kölg\u0259l\u0259r ola bil\u0259r: qar\u015f\u0131lanmam\u0131\u015f ehtiyaclar, pozulmu\u015f s\u0259rh\u0259dl\u0259r, yava\u015f-yava\u015f daxili q\u0259z\u0259b\u0259…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":251278,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[97],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-221682","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-maraqli"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/221682","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=221682"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/221682\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/251278"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=221682"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=221682"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=221682"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}