S\u0259ni itirdiyim gün… o gün…<\/p>\n
M\u0259n o günd\u0259n böyüm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131m. Ya\u015f\u0131mdan, ba\u015f\u0131mdan tez böyüm\u0259y\u0259…<\/p>\n
b\u0259z\u0259n bükülm\u0259y\u0259…s\u0259nsizliyin a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan, yoxlu\u011fundan….<\/p>\n
o günd\u0259n itkinin nec\u0259 a\u011f\u0131r oldu\u011funu d\u0259rk etm\u0259y\u0259…<\/p>\n
Dan\u0131\u015fma\u011f\u0131, gülm\u0259yi, g\u0259zm\u0259yi öyr\u0259tdiyin kimi o günd\u0259n çox \u015feyl\u0259ri öyr\u0259tdin…<\/p>\n
U\u015faq, g\u0259nc olma\u011fa imkan verm\u0259din, çox tez böyütdün m\u0259ni…<\/p>\n
u\u015faqlarla oynayanda yem\u0259k üçün ham\u0131 evin\u0259 ça\u011f\u0131r\u0131landa bir anl\u0131q yoxlu\u011funu unudub evimiz\u0259 qaç\u0131b ba\u011fl\u0131 qap\u0131lar\u0131, bo\u015f v\u0259 günl\u0259rdir bula\u015f\u0131q qalm\u0131\u015f qazan-bo\u015fqablar\u0131 görüb çilik-çilik s\u0131nma\u011f\u0131 da!!!<\/p>\n
\u0130lk günl\u0259r itkinin a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131, d\u0259rinliyi u\u015faq a\u011fl\u0131mla m\u0259n\u0259 çatmasa da, sonradan için-için s\u0259nin üçün yanaraq a\u011flama\u011f\u0131, heç zaman qovu\u015fmaq qism\u0259ti olmayacaq dar\u0131xma\u011f\u0131 da öyr\u0259tdin m\u0259n\u0259…<\/p>\n
x\u0259st\u0259l\u0259n\u0259nd\u0259 öz-özüm\u0259 sa\u011falma\u011f\u0131 da…. Qohumlar\u0131n m\u0259ni gör\u0259nd\u0259 u\u015faqlar\u0131 üçün ald\u0131\u011f\u0131 n\u0259l\u0259ris\u0259 gizl\u0259tdiyini, göz ya\u015flar\u0131m\u0131 içim\u0259 ax\u0131d\u0131b, daxil\u0259n a\u011flaya a\u011flaya ist\u0259m\u0259d\u0259n gülüms\u0259m\u0259yi d\u0259… süfr\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 yer olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 aç\u0131qca göst\u0259rm\u0259sini, m\u0259nim is\u0259 anal\u0131 bir süfr\u0259d\u0259 oturmaq h\u0259sr\u0259tliliyimi …<\/p>\n
Anal\u0131 balaya pax\u0131ll\u0131q etm\u0259k, Q\u0259bristanl\u0131\u011fa aparmazd\u0131n m\u0259ni, u\u015faqlara olmaz dey\u0259rdin… h\u0259r gün m\u0259nim üçün ziyar\u0259t yeri etdin oran\u0131… saatlarla soyuq m\u0259zar da\u015f\u0131nla d\u0259rdl\u0259\u015fm\u0259yi öyr\u0259tdin m\u0259n\u0259….<\/p>\n T\u0259till\u0259rd\u0259 ham\u0131 sevinc\u0259k ana yem\u0259yi, ana qay\u011f\u0131s\u0131 üçün evl\u0259rin\u0259 t\u0259l\u0259sdiyind\u0259 m\u0259n yen\u0259 d\u0259 unutqanl\u0131q edib, qara q\u0131f\u0131ll\u0131 qap\u0131m\u0131za üz tutardum… soyuq divarl\u0131, bombo\u015f amma içi s\u0259nli – k\u0259d\u0259rli xatir\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 dolu evimiz\u0259 s\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131rd\u0131m…<\/p>\n t\u0259mizliyimiz sanki h\u0259yat devizin idi.. s\u0259nd\u0259n sonra yuyulmayan, aylarla qat\u0131 aç\u0131lmayan v\u0259 çirkli qalan, kif iyi ver\u0259n yor\u011fan dö\u015f\u0259kl\u0259rd\u0259 yatma\u011f\u0131 öyr\u0259tdin…<\/p>\n U\u015faqlar ANAdan yetim qal\u0131r deyirl\u0259r…. sevmirdim o sözü, amma arxamca do\u011fma bildikl\u0259rim tez-tez deyirdil\u0259r…yetim u\u015faqd\u0131… onu da s\u0259n dedizdirdin… yoxlu\u011funla…<\/p>\n Qon\u015fu k\u0259ndd\u0259 anas\u0131n\u0131 itirmi\u015f u\u015faqlardan h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 ür\u0259k a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131 il\u0259 dan\u0131\u015fard\u0131n,<\/p>\n s\u0259nsiz p\u0259r\u0259n-p\u0259r\u0259n dü\u015fmü\u015f övladlar\u0131n\u0131 da dill\u0259r\u0259 d\u0259 sald\u0131n… yoxlu\u011funla…<\/p>\n Ögey ana filmin\u0259 baxanda h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 gözl\u0259rin dolurdu.. o film\u0259 baxanda hönkür-hönkür aglama\u011f\u0131 öyr\u0259tdin m\u0259n\u0259…<\/p>\n T\u0259l\u0259b\u0259 ad\u0131n\u0131 qazananda, imtahanlardan k\u0259sil\u0259nd\u0259, diplom alanda, q\u0259zaya dü\u015f\u0259nd\u0259…. h\u0259r an\u0131mda x\u0259yal\u0259n s\u0259ninl\u0259 \u015firinli-ac\u0131l\u0131 günl\u0259rimi bölü\u015fm\u0259yi öyr\u0259tdin… s\u0259nsiz s\u0259ninl\u0259 a\u011flama\u011f\u0131, gülm\u0259yi, sevinm\u0259yi, k\u0259d\u0259rl\u0259nm\u0259yi…<\/p>\n Yoxlu\u011funla do\u011fmal\u0131qdan yada çevril\u0259n insanlar\u0131n aras\u0131nda böyüm\u0259yi öyr\u0259tdin… \u0259traf\u0131mda Do\u011fma heç kimi tapmay\u0131b t\u0259k t\u0259nha y\u0131x\u0131la-dura, \u0259zil\u0259-s\u0131na, mübariz olma\u011f\u0131 öyr\u0259tdin…<\/p>\n Heç o\u011ful toyunu gör\u0259 bilm\u0259din, U\u015faq a\u011fl\u0131mla kiçik ya\u015flar\u0131mda fikir ed\u0259rdim, gör\u0259s\u0259n hans\u0131 ya\u015fda insan anasiz ya\u015faya bil\u0259r dey\u0259. 30 ya\u015f, 40 ya\u015f… yox, yen\u0259 tezdi… h\u0259tta özlüyümd\u0259 60-70 ya\u015f kimi dü\u015fün\u0259rdim… yen\u0259 d\u0259 tezdi anan\u0131 itirm\u0259k … v\u0259 bu qorxu il\u0259 h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 s\u0259n\u0259 s\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131b \u0259trini ç\u0259k\u0259rdim…<\/p>\n Çox az ya\u015fad\u0131n bu dünyada, çox az…. Sanki bir an içind\u0259 uçub getdin, heç yoxmu\u015f kimi v\u0259 olmam\u0131\u015f kimi….<\/p>\n amma ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131n günl\u0259rind\u0259 d\u0259, olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n günl\u0259rd\u0259 d\u0259 çox \u015feyl\u0259r öyr\u0259tdin m\u0259n\u0259… öyr\u0259tdikl\u0259rinl\u0259 ya\u015fay\u0131ram… s\u0259nsiz-s\u0259nli…<\/p>\n Amil<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" S\u0259ni itirdiyim gün… o gün… M\u0259n o günd\u0259n böyüm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131m. Ya\u015f\u0131mdan, ba\u015f\u0131mdan tez böyüm\u0259y\u0259… b\u0259z\u0259n bükülm\u0259y\u0259…s\u0259nsizliyin a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan, yoxlu\u011fundan…. o günd\u0259n itkinin nec\u0259 a\u011f\u0131r oldu\u011funu d\u0259rk etm\u0259y\u0259… Dan\u0131\u015fma\u011f\u0131, gülm\u0259yi, g\u0259zm\u0259yi öyr\u0259tdiyin…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":251278,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[106],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-129126","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-edebiyyat"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/129126","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=129126"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/129126\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/251278"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=129126"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=129126"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ucnoqta.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=129126"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nM\u0259n\u0259 öyr\u0259tmis\u0259n ölümünl\u0259 S\u018fN!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n
\nail\u0259 yükü ç\u0259km\u0259yi, yoxlu\u011funla pozulmu\u015f ail\u0259 düz\u0259nimizi u\u015faql\u0131\u011f\u0131mla, ham\u0131dan balaca olma\u011f\u0131ma baxmayaraq yenid\u0259n toparlama\u011f\u0131 öyr\u0259tdin…<\/p>\n
\nN\u0259v\u0259 toylar\u0131nda süz\u0259nl\u0259r d\u0259 var…<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n